I no longer feel like I wanna die. And I don’t hate myself like I use to. But I still feel like crawling into a black hole sometimes and forgetting how hard it all is. Juggling happiness and hopelessness is a difficult thing.

I never imagined adulthood being this troubling. I heard something this week that made so much sense..

“If we could predict the future, we wouldn’t even bother waking up in the morning.”

I need to get everything back in order and do good for myself. My life really does depend on it.

Also, I really miss my papa.

I need to get my life back together before I just fall over.